Category Archives: #Lovetrumpshate

Technology Can’t Follow Back

1 thought cloud

How can the very thing that makes you happy, also make you sad?

Social media is such a part of our daily lives, that it’s hard to imagine waking up and not accessing FaceBook, Twitter, Instagram or Pinterest.

Even romantic vacation spots aren’t immune, finger swipes to the right and broken hearts to the left.    We love social media and the way it makes us feel connected.  As if we’re part of something.

There’s a very real possibility that we’re no longer who we were when we created our profile pages.   Jobs change, references change and yes, the world changed.   The fact that I followed you on Twitter, is not actionable, neither is it legal or binding.

In fact it’s deniable.  Truth is you don’t know me from Eve and I don’t know you from Adam.  But it feels as if I do and I like that, because we’re social beings.

Once again I’m reminded how technology works, free of emotions.  That’s us, and its no surprise that even here in cyberspace, people are lonely.   Technology, you see will never love us back…

I’m only thinking like this now, because it’s the eve of what would’ve been my friend’s 58th birthday.  She told me that she was quite through with love, no matter with whom.   She announced that no lover was worth the diets, the clothes or the time.

She was plumper since her divorce, maybe anger masked her depression and covered her with the warm embrace of her own flesh.  She popped a bottle of champagne open and chuckled.  Yes, she insisted, she was done with the notion of falling in love.

We toasted her newfound independence, but I was filled with sadness.   She reassured me that she was fine, patted me on my hand and refilled our glasses.  Chin up and jovial about the whole thing.

L…O…V…E…   Whether we admit it or not, we all want to love and be loved.   We humans require it from birth into adulthood. Just like a plant needs sunshine, our development depends on how much love we’ve been given in our childhood, and then into adulthood. And while physical love is important, it is not as developmentally important as emotional love. Because sometimes you can be in love with someone, and still be very lonely.   My friend was like that…

It’s been said, that a body that is not at ease will become diseased, and so it was with my friend.   Five years later, when she was to turn 63 years old, she succumbed to a very curable cancer.

From her death bed she smiled at me, asked for paper and penned an apology for having refused treatment.

Ironically, her decision to not love someone else had somehow interrupted the flow of loving herself.    Her life…  or maybe it was simply a case of disuse or maybe she had forgotten how to love.

Technology can’t follow back but I can…

Nowadays, I find myself liking more people on FaceBook and it’s easy to follow on Twitter.

Life is for the living; it’s meant to be shared.    While technology has made the world incredibly small, it’s still a lot of people to meet.  We can’t go backwards, but going forward lets get LinkedIn.

For my friend…  love trumps hate every time.

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